I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
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