mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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