I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Randomize
