Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Randomize
