Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Randomize
