I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
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