Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
Randomize
