So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
