I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
Can I color on your dick again?
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
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