It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
Randomize
