IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
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