Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
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