just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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