so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
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