We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
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