What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
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