I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
I'm just going to tell you this I knocked up your girlfriend. I didn't mean to I thought it was somebody else I wasn't drunk but it was dark.
The truth is better her than my wife.
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