idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Randomize
