I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I was looking through my facebook friends list to see how many ppl on the list i've hooked up with, and was effectively reminded of my failed friendships, relationships, fuck budy-ships, friends with benefits, and "i cant remember if i ever did shit with him but we're awkward now" ships.
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize