I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
Is it sad or funny that I just bought two pregnancy test at the dollar store to give away to people on New Year's Eve while driving for Uber.
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
Shame - the story of my life.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize