"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Randomize