their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
Randomize
