better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
Randomize
