I said ACK before Andy Samberg made it even remotely funny. That tool is stealing all my lines.
Yeah, you've definitely been jizzing in your pants years before he made it socially acceptable
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
