Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Randomize