I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
