I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
So vagazzling was a success
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
Randomize