Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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