are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize