okay pat passed out under dana's car
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Randomize
