I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize