so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
Randomize
