i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
