You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
