Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
Randomize
