I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
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