i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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