I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
Randomize
