If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
