Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Randomize
