You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Randomize
