Can i not drive my cunt home
I think scott just propositioned me for sex
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
Randomize
