Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
Randomize