Your tits are I can't wait for
covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
Randomize
