now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
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