she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
This is the prime rib incident all over again
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
