i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
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