from now on my penis is your penis
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
Randomize
