listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
Randomize
