New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
