it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize
