Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
Randomize